Charlie Sheen is spouting off in a media frenzie in what can only be described as "Charliespeak."

Tuesday night he appeared on ABC's 20/20...
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"I AM on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available. If you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body."

"I probably took more (drugs) than anybody could survive. ... I was bangin' seven-gram rocks and finishing them because that's how I roll, because I have one speed, one gear. ... I'm different. I have a different constitution, I have a different brain, I have a different heart. I got tiger blood, man. Dying's for fools, dying's for amateurs." 

"I mean, what's not to love? Especially when you see how I party man, it's epic. The run I was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jagger, Richards, all of them, just look like droopy-eyed, armless children."

Monday he appeared on NBC's Today Show...
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"I'm tired of pretending I'm not a total b****in' rock star from Mars, and people can't figure me out; they can't process me. I don't expect them to. You can't process me with a normal brain."

Two and a Half Men has been shut down for the season -- and Charliespeak is to blame -- although Warner Brothers will be paying the crew for the episodes they would have worked.

Charlie bashed the show's co-creator, Chuck Lorre, in a bizarre radio interview, then followed it up with an equally bizarre open letter. 
READ IT HERE.